The first Campaigner Challenge is on 
My mission which I accepted with opened arms and a wide grin is the following:
Write a short story/flash fiction story in 200 words or less, excluding the title. It can be in any format, including a poem. Begin the story with the words, “Shadows crept across the wall”. These five words will be included in the word count.
If you want to give yourself an added challenge (optional), do one or more of these:
- end the story with the words: “everything faded.” (also included in the word count)
- include the word “orange” in the story
- write in the same genre you normally write
- make your story 200 words exactly!
I am proud to present:
“Shadows crept across the wall”
As the voiceover tries to scare the crap out of the movie theater, I glance to my right. Casually. Of course.
David sits next to me. Maybe if I look scared, he’ll put his arm around me. Protectively. I can be a damsel in distress. It does not matter that I’m 5’10. For crying out loud, I was Juliet in the last play put on by the wonderful school drama club.
Suddenly, everybody screams. I turn my attention back to the screen. Some girl with an orange tank top is running up the stairs, bleeding. Doesn’t she know that she should try to get out of the house? Unless she has wings and knows how to fly away, she’s not going to make it.
David laughs, “Look at you, toughie.” I jump. The movie doesn’t terrify me but the little butterflies running through my entire body when David, my best friend’s boyfriend, whispers in my ear freak me out. I look pass him and notice her smiling happily at me. My stomach hurts. I concentrate on the stupid movie. The voiceover starts again.
“Before she turned into a monster, she closed her eyes. Everything faded.”
Hope you enjoyed it! You should definitely check out the other entries there. I already read some amazing writing and it´s really funny to see how we all come up with something different!
J.C. Martin
/ February 20, 2012I like how you wove the movie narrative into the story. This looked to be a potentially romantic date at the cinema, and then BAM! You hit us with the fact that she’s the third wheel! Ouch. Great job!
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks
Rachel Morgan
/ February 20, 2012Clever way of utilizing the opening and closing lines.
“Maybe if I look scared, he’ll put his arm around me. Protectively. I can be a damsel in distress.” <– that made me smile
xx Rachel
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Rachel
and I´m glad I made you smile!
Daisy Carter
/ February 20, 2012I LOVE this! Such an awesome flash – you should turn this concept into something! I totally didn’t see the third wheel aspect coming, either!
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Daisy
I am actually thinking of turning this flash into an entire manuscript at some point…
Eve
/ February 20, 2012Oh that was good. A real fun challenge.
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Eve
tracikenworth
/ February 20, 2012I, too, loved the third wheel aspect.
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Traci
Jenny
/ February 20, 2012Love the story! Great narrative. I feel for the storyteller’s predicament. These teen triangle things. I tell you what.
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Jenny
The love triangles can be so heartbreaking…
Jessica
/ February 20, 2012Ooh really cool! Love the tension in this scene! Great job
I’m #19
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Jesssica
Morgan Shamy
/ February 20, 2012LOL! I loved the voice… nice way adding in the humor–it was very unexpected!
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Morgan
I really enjoyed writing with that voice so I´m glad you liked it!
David P. King
/ February 20, 2012Nice one! Kind of reminds me of a skit I did back when I was in a drama class.
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks David
Must have been a fun skit to act…
Bess Weatherby
/ February 20, 2012I like this! Interesting take on it. You put a lot of information into a very short space. I can see a whole story forming.
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Bess
I am thinking about turning into a whole story…
Kerri Maniscalco
/ February 20, 2012Oh hey Miss AWESOME tension builder in 200 words! You did a FANTASTIC job with this, I heart, heart, HEART it
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012THANKS Kerri
I am glad you enjoyed it *blushing*
tara tyler
/ February 20, 2012hate those predicaments! well done!
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Tara
Susan
/ February 20, 2012Ha! Nice twist!
I’m a fellow Campaigner from your YA group–just stopping by to say hello.
Good luck in the campaign and I’ll see you around!
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Susan
Looking forward to getting to know you better 
Kelly Hashway
/ February 20, 2012Great job! Loved it.
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Kelly
Carrie Butler
/ February 20, 2012“Unless she has wings and knows how to fly away, she’s not going to make it.”
Hah! I loved that line.
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Carrie
I was smiling when I wrote that line, glad you liked it …
Adrianne Russell
/ February 20, 2012I was all in, thinking the two of them were on a date and WHOOPS, there’s the best friend/girlfriend. I’m a sucker for romantic triangles!
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Margo Kelly
/ February 20, 2012I love the setting of a movie theater. Nice job!
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Margo
Kevin Hiatt
/ February 20, 2012I really liked it. You have a knack for putting the reader in the story because I swear I could see it all like I was sitting just behind them watching. Great job!
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Awww
*blushing* Thanks Kevin!
Lady Gwen
/ February 21, 2012Clever use of the challenge lines/words. Well done!
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Gwen!
Abhishek Boinapalli
/ February 21, 2012Hmmm!!
A lovely and good story!!
tough girl not scared about anything ..but butterflies run through her entire body when …
Liked the character a lot!! Would be happy to read more about it!!
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks
I am glad you liked the character. I loved getting into her head for these 200 words!
Ashley
/ February 21, 2012Oh man! Didn’t see that coming! Great job!! I’d like to know how this plays out!
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Ashley
I am thinking about turning this flash fiction into something bigger 
bridgetstraub
/ February 21, 2012This is great. I enjoyed your voice in this. Mine is # 71
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks
I had fun playing around with this voice 
Daniel Todd Noyes
/ February 21, 2012Are there two Davids in this story or is she trying to steal her best-friend’s boyfriend? Crazy!
Well done.
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Daniel…
Ann Cory
/ February 21, 2012Super fun and creative – loved the whole set up – excellent!
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Ann
Charmaine Clancy
/ February 21, 2012Funny and clever
#83
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Charmaine
Ainsley Shay
/ February 21, 2012Good job! I wasn’t expecting “his” girlfriend to be there too.
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Ainsley
C.B. Wentworth
/ February 21, 2012I like how you played with point of view on this.
Great job!
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks C.B. I really had fun with this bit
averymarsh
/ February 21, 2012Ha, loved the third wheel twist. Poor girl. Fantastic voice, too.
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Avery
I am very glad you liked the voice!
Megan
/ February 21, 2012Love it! Such a good story in so few words! I would totally read a whole book based around this.
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Megan
I am actually thinking about turning this flash fiction into something bigger 
bornstoryteller
/ February 21, 2012ruh roh..someone is in love with the wrong guy…and he’s sending out signals. Trouble is brewing.
Tale Spinning: Wednesday’s Child
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Trouble is indeed brewing
siv maria
/ February 21, 2012This was a nice change from all the scary stuff. Touching and I agree, great use of lines.
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks
I thought about writing something scary at the beginning but then my fingers took me another way 
K S Collier
/ February 21, 2012For a short story, this was wonderful. Nothing like the right guy with the wrong girl. Scary thought when it’s your best friend. Oh, the dilemma.
I loved it.
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thank you very much K S
Laurie Buchanan
/ February 22, 2012Loved your story – waaaaaaay creative!
Laurie Buchanan (entry #92)
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thank you so much Laurie
Glad you liked it!
jchasenovelist
/ February 22, 2012Loved this! You write great dialogue
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thank you!
Alexia Chamberlynn
/ February 22, 2012Cute story! But she’s in trouble, falling for the wrong guy…
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thank you Alexia
She´s definitely in big big trouble…
Carrie Bastyr
/ February 22, 2012Fun interpretation and great twist! Love this!
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Carrie
I´m glad you enjoyed it!
Gwen
/ February 22, 2012Oh, great inner angst there. And I love the unique direction this one takes.
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Gwen!
I wanted something fun with a twist to show the inner angst 
Diane Gillette
/ February 22, 2012Awww, poor girl! So hard being a teenager. Great choice for the setting!
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Diane
Arlee Bird
/ February 22, 2012That was indeed a different approach. I felt like a teenager again.
Lee (#126 on the Campaign Challenge List)
An A to Z Co-Host
Tossing It Out
Twitter: @AprilA2Z
#atozchallenge
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Awww
This warmed my heart…Glad it made you feel like a teenager again!
Cortney
/ February 23, 2012Great setting–love the movie theater aspect!
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Cortney!
Doreen
/ February 23, 2012I did not see the best friend coming. Good job!
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Doreen
C.M. Brown
/ February 23, 2012The love triangle, ouch! Nice!
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks C.M.
Yep the love triangle hurts…
Melissa Maygrove (@MelissaMaygrove)
/ February 23, 2012I like that you used the contest phrase as dialogue (well, voice over – LOL) Clever. Nice twist with the friend, too.
Melissa Maygrove
#149 on the Campaign Challenge list
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thanks Melissa
I´m glad you enjoyed it 
Naresh Khoisnam
/ February 24, 2012A wise technique I’d say. Good one. Loved going through
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Thank you Naresh
Gina
/ February 25, 2012Good news! You made it to the next round with your flash fiction piece! You’ve been short-listed to move on to stage two
Stay tuned for more info on Rachael’s blog.
Congrats!
Gina
Elodie
/ February 25, 2012Yay!!!!
Thank you SO much Gina!!! I´m so excited!
*Happy dance*
Sarah Pearson
/ February 26, 2012I’m working my way thorough everyone. So glad I didn’t miss this, very different
Gilliad Stern
/ February 27, 2012I like how you bounced back and forth between the movie and the story. Very different! I like it.